Cultivating a professional network is a bit like gardening. It takes patience and constant attention. Some job seekers may feel they lack an extensive professional network.
A contact does not have to have been met in a professional setting to be relevant. Your immediate circle of friends and family can be incredibly helpful in supporting you in your job search, but you may need to do a little work to help them help you.
1. Tell them what you need
Many family members may be willing to help you, but they may not know what you need. So when you ask a family member for help, treat them like any other business contact and make specific and reasonable requests.
If you know someone in your circle knows someone who could help you with your job search, don’t beat around the bush and ask for an introduction. Make sure you know what your end goal is and make a specific request accordingly.
2. Don't take advantage
It’s important to remember that asking someone for a favor in your job search is also asking them to give their time and energy and put their professional reputation on the line. So before you make any request, understand what you are asking for, including the reputational implications.
When a network contact connects you with a person or opportunity, they are spending some of their personal social capital. If you act inappropriately or are unreliable, the reputation of your contact is at risk. This is true even if you are one of their closest friends or family members.
3. Keep your requests simple
When turning to a family member for your application, keep your application simple. You may be flexible about the types of positions you are willing to accept, but that doesn’t mean you have to share all your options with every family member you approach for help. If your application is too complicated, even if they are committed to your success, they may overlook your options. Remember that the people in your life are a stepping stone to a professional contact relevant to your job search. They do not have to carry your message. Try to limit your request to one or two simple and memorable items.
4. Make sure you are qualified
Don’t put anyone in an awkward position by asking for referrals or job offers for which you are not qualified. If you ask your brother-in-law to circulate your application to his contacts, you must have specific reasons why you are a good candidate. While a family member may give you a leg up, if you are not qualified for the position, it will not have a positive effect on either of you. Being related to someone does not make you a good candidate.
5. Consider the benefits they get out of it
Remember that networking is a two-way street. It is about enriching each other, not taking advantage of someone. There are many ways to give back to someone who has helped you. Sometimes your help won’t be needed right away, but be sure to keep in mind the service others have done for you. Find out how you can help them with their career in return. And, it goes without saying, a thank you card or gift is always, always appreciated by someone who helps you in your endeavor.
It’s fine to network with people with whom you already have a strong relationship, but remember that this is professional help, not personal. Don’t expect a referral because you are family or friends. In a job search, think of all your contacts as professional opportunities – it’s up to you to take it.